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It’s A Miracle That All Sensible Parents Aren’t In Jail

I have a little quiz for you. The biggest problem facing children in the United States of America today is: A) Strangers roaming the streets and parks, poised to snatch your children the moment you turn your back OR B) A complete lack of independence leading to obesity, boredom, and children who reach adulthood without […]

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Tears, Cookies, And The Violent Femmes

At this point, I can’t be coy about loving the weeks when my daughter is at sleepaway camp – I’ve been too outspoken to attempt any kind of sentimentally about it. Perhaps this year she sensed it more, or was just being extra emotional about going, but a few days ago she sat down at […]

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Like Clockwork, It’s Time To Ban Ice Cream and Icees again

Every year, when the weather gets warm. parents complain about how the ice cream truck makes their children cry. Their logic goes like this: “I don’t want my child to have ice cream. But I don’t want my child to be indoors. There are ice cream trucks outdoors. When I won’t let my child buy […]

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BMI and Kids: Why It’s Bullshit

Today the NY Post ran a story about a girl in Staten Island who was told by her school that she was fat. One look at her and it’s obvious that she’s anything but. However, the notice from her school wasn’t based on looking at her, it was based on her BMI – body mass […]

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James Bond Needs A Calendar

It’s Spring Concert week at Jake’s school, a week I actually like very much. The concerts at his school are fantastic. But it stresses me out that he has to wear a suit a couple of times during concert weeks – once during the school day and once for the evening concert. An organized person […]

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The Day My Son Pointed A Gun At My Face

Fiona and Jake at an anti-gun rally in 2013 Four or five years ago I went to a birthday party at my step-brother’s house in Kansas. I don’t know my step-brother well. I don’t know any of my step-siblings well, and I have a lot of them. But my dad got remarried when I was […]

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Do You Have An Emergency Period Pack For Your Tween girl?

My daughter is nine. I don’t think she’s going to get her period any time real soon. I got mine when I was eleven, during a snowball fight at recess (I felt something wet and thought it was snow – that is such a Buffalo way to get your period). But I’ve heard that statistically […]

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The Punishment Panel

Yesterday morning I headed to the WPIX studios near Grand Central to do a live spot about kids and punishments with my friends Rebecca and Mitch. As I stood on the subway platform yawning and grumbling I had to remind myself that Jake leaves for school that early every freaking day. Then again, he doesn’t […]

5 Things I’ve Accepted That Make Parenthood Easier

As a parent there are many, many things I wish I could just stick my head in the sand about. But that doesn’t help anybody. Accepting the following things early on makes them much easier to deal with when they actually happen. You don’t feel blindsided. 1) My kids will hate me. I’ve seen other […]

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Perceived Danger Vs. Real Danger Vs. A Cup Of Coffee

I posted this a little while ago: And sometimes I forget that not everyone can read my mind. The people who really know me, if I said this in conversation, would know that I meant “Turn off the car! Lock the doors! Take your keys with you!” But instead, between twitter and facebook, the comments […]