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Four Weeks Low Carb And SO Ready To Be Done

I woke up yesterday morning and as I was weighing myself, I had a terrible thought: If I’d planned this stupid low-carb experiment for four weeks instead of six, I would be done and I could have a bagel for breakfast. Honestly I have no idea why I picked six weeks. I knew it couldn’t […]


Shirataki Noodles Taste Like What They Are

Since the moment I announced that I was going low carb for six weeks, people have been making suggestions about what I should eat. The most common suggestions can be lumped under “cauliflower made to look like other foods” – pizza crust, rice, grilled cheese, etc. The second-most common suggestion was shirataki noodles. Shirataki noodles […]


How To Do Your Own Taxes Like A Pro(crastinator)

I submitted my tax returns a little before midnight on April 15th this year. That is by no means the latest I’ve ever turned them in. For years and years we always got refunds from both Federal and State, so I was submitting them about as late as my husband would let me get away […]


Randomosity: Oral History Edition

I would put NewsRadio up there with some of the best sitcoms in history. But while I was watching it, I always felt like I was the only one. This is a fascinating oral history of the show that partially explains why it did so badly in the ratings (it was moved around 11 times, […]


How To Clean Removable Waffle And Grill Plates

One of the reasons why I chose my awesome waffle iron and incredible grill/griddle combo is that they both came with removable, dishwasher-safe plates. I imagined how easy they would be to clean. But even my powerful dishwasher was no match for the burnt on, sticky messes that I routinely make of those plates. When […]


Why Was He Was Running Away?

I just saw video that will haunt my dreams tonight. It shows a man, apparently unarmed and running away, being shot in the back by a police officer and killed. If you must watch it, know that it clearly shows the shooting and also contains bad language, from the appropriately shocked person taking the cell […]


Is That A Banana In Your Bunker Or Are You Just Happy To See Me?

I have a Banana Bunker, and it causes a stir wherever I take it. What the heck is a Banana Bunker, you’re probably asking yourself? This. What the WHAT? What is that FOR? Does this help? I bought these for my kids’ lunches several years ago, thinking that banana and peanut butter would be a […]


One Million Dollars

I posted this screenshot on Facebook today with the caption “Seriously, fuck off.” And you might be confused. On its face, the email looks innocuous. It’s polite, he calls me by my correct name, it’s concise. It even implies that there is money involved, and I’m always screaming about how I don’t work for free. […]

SelfishMom baguettes

How To Bake Delicious Baguettes

This post contains affiliate links. It won’t cost you a thing to click on them, and if you buy something you’ll be supporting my baking habit. In my last post I told you how to make baguette dough. Hopefully the dough has been in your refrigerator for a day at least, rising to about triple […]


Do You Shave Your Legs For Your Doctor?

In my entire life I’ve never gone to a doctor’s appointment without shaving my legs. All the way up. Like I’m going to wear a bathing suit. OK, I’m not counting when I was still going to a pediatrician (although frankly, even at five years old my legs could have used a shave). Until today. […]